Final Draft

According to the 'Naver cast', people have gotten serious pressure when they live in a group living(Bum, 2013). Because of this pressure, people started to consume to follow others and the author call this situation the psychology of trend consumption. The author said that this phenomenon is prevailed all over our lives, however, we should not consider it as a easy. Some people who does not follow trend think that following trend is not unique. At this point, there is a question. Can you assure that you are an unique person who does not follow the trend? Think about some situations.When you walk on the road, wearing you own fashion which is very old. And others are very fresh who have some trend items. Are you sure that you are not aware of others and intimidated? Thinking about this question more seriously, I argue that "Everyone follows trend."

Human live in a group living. Human make some groups to improve their ability. In this group, human feel familiarity each other and try to feel familiarity with their group members. In this group activity, a kind of pressure start to exist. Due to this pressure people buy or do things that other people have done.People call this situation as trend consumption psychology. The pressure is really serious that people cannot ignore easily and this phenomenon applies fashion to choosing the major of university(Bum, 2013). Most of people want to feel relief and they think that they should follow trend to feel it, getting pressure. There are some effects that is about this phenomenon. First one is 'Band Wagon' effect. This effect means that at first conspicuous consumption is started with the rich, however, when surrounding people follow this consumption people call this situation bandwagon effect. In a word, this effect means consumption phenomenon that people consume, following the trend.

When People live in a group living, people started to be sensitive to trend. I can find the cause from the a sense of belonging by purchasing particular products that friend has used. We lead fashion, it is because when we mimic the others' behavior, we can feel sympathy. Moreover, imitation becomes stronger when a group is more friendly, so people follow trend to be more friendly. When people become more friendly, they feel that they belong to the society. The reason why human have desire to belong to societies is that human is social animal. So typically when deciding whether to purchase a particular product, we are influenced from others in the social group. If that influence is closely related to the identity of the group, our purchasing behavior will happen in the direction of 'convergence' in the collective action. For example, nowadays increasing the population of car poor is serious social problem. Car poor is a group who have only car in their property. Although trend consumption have became social problem, there are some reasons like pressure that people consume with following trend. However, this is not limited to consuming. For instance, in an experiment which was enacted by EBS(Jung, 2008), the experimenters set a situation. Excepting subjects, experimenter and others made a promise in advance that do not go out of a room, even though the room was enveloped in smoke. In this situation, most of subjects didn't get out of the room which is full of smoke. After the experiment experimenter asked the subjects "Why did you keep sitting on the chair?" They answered " It's because others also keep sitting on the chair, so I think that the smoke is no matter. And I cannot move to see outside easily because of others." Through this, I can convince that people follow trend.

When people read this argument, they can think that if they are not aware of others' eyes they can avoid this kind of phenomenon. This suggestion is very easy as it seems because the suggesters consider themselves as someone who is not applied to the phenomenon. However, if they faced or realized that they are also applied to this phenomenon ,they would also have difficulty to avoid it. Others also can say that there are some side effects like consuming by force like the rich not to fall behind others. This is true. However, the side effect can become a strong point. According to the 'Naver cast', the author said that we can consider this effect as seeking the selective value of group(Bum, 2013). The opponents also insist that This phenomenon is applied to certain group so that this is limitative. It can be true ,but it is not important. The more important thing is the existence of these kinds of people who are influenced by this phenomenon.

It is true that this phenomenon has various negative effects, however this phenomenon also gives us a adequate social phenomenon. As I mention before this (above this paragraph ). Thus the psychology of trend consumption is not always bad. Through the reasons that I suggested, everyone follows trend. I will mention the reasons of my argument again. People have lived a group living so that they have wanted to belong their society. In the process of belonging their society, they want to feel sense of kinship. To feel this sense they began to be aware of others and imitate common things of others. This situation was developed to the psychology of trend consumption. There are some another reason that people undergo the phenomenon. People get pressure which we cannot see. So, they get pressure that they have to follow others. This is inevitable. Through this I think that "Everyone follows trend."

References

• Kim Hyeon-Jin (2013, April 23) Car Donga.com [Fashion consumption mapr of Korea] Daejeon is the most sensitive to fashion ... Gwangju is ranked NO.1 about Outdoor clothes. Retrieved from http://car.donga.com/List/3/01/20130423/54629534/4-

• Science YTN (2013, February 5) Treend Consumption Psychology.  Retrived from http://science.ytn.co.kr/program/program_view.phps_mcd=0070&s_hcd=&key=201302051631589492

• Kim Soo-Jin (2013) The feature of society of Korean comsumption.  Retrived from https://www.google.co.kr/urlsa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=8&sqi=2&ved=0CEwQFjAH&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.seejang.co.kr%2Fboard%2Fdownload.asp%3Ffolder_name%3DData15%26no%3D60%26filename%3D%25BF%25EC%25B8%25AE%25B3%25AA%25B6%25F3%2520%25BC%25D2%25BA%25F1%25BB%25E7%25C8%25B8%25C0%25C7%2520%25C6%25AF%25C2%25A1.pptx&ei=cxMVJKnA82B8gW0u4HIBQ&usg=AFQjCNHP4VTwQdIzvrDSWpSnj5gw3bovMw&sig2=b9WEEGUpGmGjpCPxtBnbrA&bvm=bv.77880786,d.dGc&cad=rjt-

• Bum Sang-Kyu (2013, February 1) [Psychology of Consumption] If my friends buy, I want to follow them. Retrived from http://navercast.naver.com/contents.nhn?rid=199&contents_id=20174

• (2014, September 15) Let's find about consumption psychology marketing. Retrived from http://blog.naver.com/kdcblog1?Redirect=Log&logNo=220122392964

• (2013, October 12)Veblen effect & band wagon effect & snob effect : Luxuary consumption Psychology. Retrived from http://eunh_ye.blog.me/110177640336

• (2013, February 21) Trend consumption psychology If you buy, I also buy~. Retrived from http://blog.naver.com/ekwhdk31123?Redirect=Log&logNo=10160721151

• Jung Sung-uk(2008) Two faces of Human. Retrived from http://home.ebs.co.kr/docuprime/newReleaseView/196?c.page=10

Second draft

According to the 'Naver cast', people have gotten serious pressure when they live in a group living. Because of this pressure, people started to consume to follow others and the author call this situation the psychology of trend consumption. The author said that this phenomenon is prevailed all over our lives, however, we should not consider it as a easy. Some people who does not follow trend think that following trend is not unique. At this point, there is a question. Can you assure that you are an unique person who does not follow the trend? Think about some situations.When you walk on the road, wearing you own fashion which is very old. And others are very fresh who have some trend items. Are you sure that you are not aware of others and intimidated? Thinking about this question more seriously, I argue that "Everyone follows trend."

Human live in a group living. Human make some groups to improve their ability. In this group, human feel familiarity each other and try to feel familiarity with their group members. In this group activity, a kind of pressure start to exist. Due to this pressure people buy or do things that other people have done.People call this situation as trend consumption psychology. The pressure is really serious that people cannot ignore easily and this phenomenon applies fashion to choosing the major of university. Most of people want to feel relief and they think that they should follow trend to feel it, getting pressure. There are some effects that is about this phenomenon. First one is 'Band Wagon' effect. This effect means that at first conspicuous consumption is started with the rich, however, when surrounding people follow this consumption people call this situation bandwagon effect. In a word, this effect means consumption phenomenon that people consume, following the trend.

  When People live in a group living, people started to be sensitive to trend. I can find the cause from the a sense of belonging by purchasing particular products that friend has used. We lead fashion, it is because when we mimic the others' behavior, we can feel sympathy. Moreover, imitation becomes stronger when a group is more friendly, so people follow trend to be more friendly. When people become more friendly, they feel that they belong to the society. The reason why human have desire to belong to societies is that human is social animal. So typically when deciding whether to purchase a particular product, we are influenced from others in the social group.   If that influence is closely related to the identity of the group, our purchasing behavior will happen in the direction of 'convergence' in the collective action. For example, nowadays increasing the population of car poor is serious social problem. Car poor is a group who have only car in their property. Although trend consumption have became social problem, there are some reasons like pressure that people consume with following trend. However, this is not limited to consuming. For instance, in an experiment which was enacted by EBS, the experimenters set a situation. Excepting subjects, experimenter and others made a promise in advance that do not go out of a room, even though the room was enveloped in smoke. In this situation, most of subjects didn't get out of the room which is full of smoke. After the experiment experimenter asked the subjects "Why did you keep sitting on the chair?" They answered " It's because others also keep sitting on the chair, so I think that the smoke is no matter. And I cannot move to see outside easily because of others." Through this, I can convince that people follow trend.

When people read this argument, they can think that if they are not aware of others' eyes they can avoid this kind of phenomenon. This suggestion is very easy as it seems because the suggesters consider themselves as someone who is not applied to the phenomenon. However, if they faced or realized that they are also applied to this phenomenon ,they would also have difficulty to avoid it. Others also can say that there are some side effects like consuming by force like the rich not to fall behind others. This is true. However, the side effect can become a strong point. According to the 'Naver cast', the author said that we can consider this effect as seeking the selective value of group. The opponents also insist that This phenomenon is applied to certain group so that this is limitative. It can be true ,but it is not important. The more important thing is the existence of these kinds of people who are influenced by this phenomenon.

It is true that this phenomenon has various negative effects, however this phenomenon also gives us a adequate social phenomenon. As I mention before this (above this paragraph ). Thus the psychology of trend consumption is not always bad. Through the reasons that I suggested, everyone follows trend. I will mention the reasons of my argument again. People have lived a group living so that they have wanted to belong their society. In the process of belonging their society, they want to feel sense of kinship. To feel this sense they began to be aware of others and imitate common things of others. This situation was developed to the psychology of trend consumption. There are some another reason that people undergo the phenomenon. People get pressure which we cannot see. So, they get pressure that they have to follow others. This is inevitable. Through this I think that "Everyone follows trend."

References

• Kim Hyeon-Jin (2013, April 23) Car Donga.com [Fashion consumption mapr of Korea] Daejeon is the most sensitive to fashion ... Gwangju is ranked NO.1 about Outdoor clothes. Retrieved  from http://car.donga.com/List/3/01/20130423/54629534/4-

• http://science.ytn.co.kr/program/program_view.phps_mcd=0070&s_hcd=&key=201302051631589492
• https://www.google.co.kr/urlsa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=8&sqi=2&ved=0CEwQFjAH&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.seejang.co.kr%2Fboard%2Fdownload.asp%3Ffolder_name%3DData15%26no%3D60%26filename%3D%25BF%25EC%25B8%25AE%25B3%25AA%25B6%25F3%2520%25BC%25D2%25BA%25F1%25BB%25E7%25C8%25B8%25C0%25C7%2520%25C6%25AF%25C2%25A1.pptx&ei=cxMVJKnA82B8gW0u4HIBQ&usg=AFQjCNHP4VTwQdIzvrDSWpSnj5gw3bovMw&sig2=b9WEEGUpGmGjpCPxtBnbrA&bvm=bv.77880786,d.dGc&cad=rjt-
• http://navercast.naver.com/contents.nhn?rid=199&contents_id=20174
• http://blog.naver.com/kdcblog1?Redirect=Log&logNo=220122392964
• http://eunh_ye.blog.me/110177640336
• http://blog.naver.com/ekwhdk31123?Redirect=Log&logNo=10160721151

 

Self Evaluation

1) What score do you think you deserve? Here is the rubric:

 

  1 point

My topic is hard to write something that which is right and which is wrong. There is no debatable element. This is because my topic is just a phenomenon and fact.

2) What did you do well?

The effects of phenomenons like 'Band wagon' effect can be a good factor, but I didn't use this thing properly. 

arguments are based off of opinions and personal feelings.
3) What could you have done better?

 At first, I think I should change my topic, referring what teacher recommended.

4) Which part of the classical argument did you use the best? 

  The narration

5) Which part of the classical argument did you use the most poorly?

 

 From deciding the topic, my argument could not be done well. 

6) What's your strategy to make your second draft better?

 At first, I think I should change my topic, referring what teacher recommended.

First draft

According to the naver cast, people have gotten serious pressure when they live in a group living. Because of this pressure, people started to consume to follow others and the author call this situation the psychology of trend consumption. The author said that this phenomenon is prevailed all over our lives, however, we should not consider it as a easy. Some people who does not follow trend think that following trend is not unique. At this point, there is a question. Can you assure that you are an unique person who does follow not the trend? Think about some situations.When you walk on the road, wearing you own fashion which is very old. And others are very fresh who have some trend items. Are you sure that you are not aware of others and intimidated? Thinking about this question more seriously, I argue that 'The phenomenon that people follow some trends is reasonable'.

Human live in a group living. Human make some groups to improve their ability. In this group, human feel familiarity each other and try to feel familiarity with their group members. In this group activity, a kind of pressure start to exist. Due to this pressure people buy or do things that other people have done. This situation is trend consumption psychology. The pressure is really serious that people cannot ignore easily and this phenomenon applies fashion to choosing the major of university. Most of people want to feel relief and they think that they should follow trend to feel it, getting pressure.  There are some effects that is about this phenomenon. First one is 'Band Wagon' effect. This effect means that at first conspicuous consumption is started with the rich, however, when surrounding people follow this consumption people call this situation bandwagon effect. In a word, this effect means consumption phenomenon that people consume ,following the trend. 

 The trend consumption psychology is imitation. This is inevitable imitation. When People live in a group living, people started to be sensitive to trend. I can find the cause from the a sense of belonging by purchasing particular products that friend has used. We lead fashion, it is because when we mimic the others' behavior, we can feel sympathy. Moreover, imitation becomes stronger when a group is more friendly. Human have a strong desire to want to belong a social group because human is a social animal. So typically when deciding whether to purchase a particular product, we are influenced from others in the social group. If that influence is closely related to the identity of the group, our purchasing behavior will happen in the direction of 'convergence' in the collective action. For example, nowadays increasing the population of car poor is serious social problem. Car poor is a group who have only car in their property. Although trend consumption have became social problem, there are some reasons like pressure that people consume with following trend.

In contrast, the influence of social groups shows the selective value of the collective whole rather than to represent the collective identity. For example, buying a popular toothpaste or if you are willing to join in the life insurance products which gain the public's trust. It differs in that it wants to follow the best value to the community, rather than seeking to converge on group identity,this is because you want to share the value of collective by sympathizing with group action. By simply taking a collective value, rather than  sympathizing with collective action is desirable in that the more realistic decisions. So, the trend consumption is not always bad.

  When people read this argument, they can think that if they are not aware of others' eyes they can avoid this kind of phenomenon. This suggestion is very easy as it seems because the suggesters consider themselves as someone who is not applied to the phenomenon. However, if they faced or realized that they are also aplied to this phenomenon ,they would also have difficulty to avoid it. Others also can say that there are some side effects like consuming by force like the rich not to fall behind others. This is true. However, the side effect can become a strong point. According to the 'Navercast', the author said that we can consider this effect as seeking the selective value of group. The opponents also insist that This phenomenon is applied to certain group so that this is limitative. It is true ,but it is not important. The more important thing is the existence of these kinds of people who are influenced by this phenomenon. 

It is true that this phenomenon has various negative effects, however this phenomenon also gives us a adequate social phenomenon. As I mention before this (above this paragraph ). Thus the psychology of trend consumption is not always bad. Through the reasons that I suggested, The phenomenon that people follow some trends is reasonable. I will mention the reasons of my argument again.People have lived a group living so that they have wanted to belong their society. In the process of belonging their society, they want to feel sense of kinship. To feel this sense they began to be aware of others and imitate common things of others. This situation was developed to the psychology of trend consumption. There are some another reason that people undergo the phenomenon. People get pressure which we cannot see. So, they get pressure that they have to follow others. This is inevitable. Through this I think that 'The phenomenon that people follow some trends is reasonable.'

The conclusion

5. The summation, which provides a strong conclusion, amplifying the force of the argument, and showing the readers that this solution is the best at meeting the circumstances.

I will close with a summary of my previous points, emphasize that the trend consumption effect is reasonable and negative effects of it. I will end with a reaffirmation of my original thesis.

It is true that this phenomenon has various negative effects, however this phenomenon also gives us a adequate social phenomenon. As I mention before this (above this paragraph ). Thus the psychology of trend consumption is not always bad. Through the reasons that I suggested, The phenomenon that people follow some trends is reasonable. I will mention the reasons of my argument again.People have lived a group living so that they have wanted to belong their society. In the process of belonging their society, they want to feel sense of kinship. To feel this sense they began to be aware of others and imitate common things of others. This situation was developed to the psychology of trend consumption. There are some another reason that people undergo the phenomenon. People get pressure which we cannot see. So, they get pressure that they have to follow others. This is inevitable. Through this I think that 'The phenomenon that people follow some trends is reasonable.'

The refutation and concession

4. The refutation and concession, which looks at opposing viewpoints to the writer’s claims, anticipating objections from the audience, and allowing as much of the opposing viewpoints as possible without weakening the thesis.

I will concede that people can avoid this phenomenon if they are not aware of others' eyes and there are some bad effects of this phenomenon. I will suggest some results of experiments to show that group living makes some serious pressure.

1. What is my thesis?
'The phenomenon that people follow some trends is reasonable'.

2. What is the opposite position?
'The phenomenon that people follow some trends is not reasonable'.

3. What arguments can I anticipate?
  1)There are some side effcts of this phenomenon
  2) This phenomenon is applied to certain group so that this is limitative.
 
4. How will I counter those arguments?
1) What you said is fact, however you can see the effects positively like seeking the value of group.
2) It is true ,but it is not important. The more important thing is the existence of these kinds of people who are influenced by this phenomenon.

My Refutation and Concession
   When people read this argument, they can think that if they are not aware of others' eyes they can avoid this kind of phenomenon. This suggestion is very easy as it seems because the suggesters consider themselves as someone who is not applied to the phenomenon. However, if they faced or realized that they are also aplied to this phenomenon ,they would also have difficulty to avoid it. Others also can say that there are some side effects like consuming by force like the rich not to fall behind others. This is true. However, the side effect can become a strong point. According to the 'Navercast', the author said that we can consider this effect as seeking the selective value of group. The opponents also insist that This phenomenon is applied to certain group so that this is limitative. It is true ,but it is not important. The more important thing is the existence of these kinds of people who are influenced by this phenomenon.

 

Research

http://car.donga.com/List/3/01/20130423/54629534/4- The development of trend consumption.

It shows that people now consume economically, 'value consumption'  and do not impulse buying.